Mediator Profile: Ellen Morfei

How did you get started in mediation? 
I’d been an informal mediator for a long time – what some folks call a “small m” mediator (vs a “big M” trained mediator). I was working a demanding job in big Pharma and was longing to mare align my work with my values. In 2011, When my company announced it was closing my work site, I decided to take the severance package and jump into a more meaningful life. Mediation is a big part of that.

What do you most enjoy about being a mediator?
I love helping people get through a challenge. I love helping people develop and believe in their self-efficacy. I love helping people learn that they can manage conflict more productively.

What do you find is your greatest challenge? 
Making a living! I’m fortunate to have reached a place and time in my life where I can manage with a part-time income. I’m not sure I could muster a full-time income from my mediation work.

What advice would you give yourself if you could go back to the start of your mediation practice?
There have been a few small fumbles along the way, but I’m happy with the overall trajectory of my private practice Progressive Conflict Solutions in Media, Delaware County. I launched my business on international conflict resolution day (October) of 2013. I’ve refined my practice along the way and continue to refine it, but none of that could have been skipped with wise advice early on.

What is a fun fact about yourself? 
I enjoy salsa dancing (and am pretty decent). I’m currently learning to lead in salsa, which is the role more commonly performed by the male dancer.
 
Where have you found value in your PCM membership?
I’ve found PCM to be a very enjoyable and positive experience. I think the conference and pre-conference workshops are excellent and I appreciate the newsletter and directory. When I was considering getting training and possibly launching a practice, the PCM website was one of my best resources.

I’ve also had the honor of serving on the PCM board for three of years during which I was treasurer for two year. It was a great way to contribute to the profession and community of practice, but it also gave me a way to influence the addition of services that I wanted from PCM. I would highly recommend fellow mediators not just join PCM, but really get involved.

What do you do when you are not mediating?
So many things! I’m a single parent and very active in my community. I’m always doing something! Hiking, dancing, home improvement. Really, it’s almost an endless list!

In what type(s) or area(s) of mediation do you engage

I’m on the volunteer roster for two local community mediation centers as well as a few other professional rosters, but the vast majority of my mediation work is through my private practice Progressive Conflict Solutions. My private mediation work serves families, small businesses, and organizations. The vast majority of what I do is divorce and custody.

Years in mediation  Eight years.

Years a member of PCM  Eight years.

Involvement in PCM

• Board of Directors, 2013-2016; Treasurer 2014-2016
• Various committees and working groups
• Started social media program
• Founded and facilitated monthly discussion call for mediators in private practice
• Primary organizer and host of 2015 Southeastern regional forum“Crafting Better Mediation Outcomes through Party Preparation” Panel Discussion and Networking Event

• PCM Conference presentations
“Coaching to Improve Mediation Outcomes: An Examination of Processes, Pitfalls, and Ethics,”
“Using On-Line Mediation in Your Practice,” facilitated.

Mediator Profile: Stanley Braverman, MBA, JD

What do you most enjoy about being a mediator?
The collaborative, problem-solving aspect of the mediation process. I am amazed by how parties, when working in good faith, can find a mutually agreeable way to negotiate solutions to what was, prior to the mediation, an intractable problem.  Generally, the results are far better in terms of the parties’ view than what a court would order.

What do you find is your greatest challenge? 
Scheduling. Most of my mediations last four to six hours, although many go longer. I request the parties be available for the full business day, as it is difficult to predict in advance how long a mediation will last. Getting the disputing parties and their attorneys to agree to a date and location is very time consuming.

What advice would you give yourself if you could go back to the start of your mediation practice?
Network more. When I was in an office of mediators, keeping current with new ideas and approaches was part of the workday. Working independently there are fewer opportunities to share experiences and techniques with other professional mediators. Networking through trainings and sharing experiences with other mediators is an invaluable benefit of having a PCM membership and why I am a longstanding member of PCM.

What is a fun fact about yourself? 
I am obsessed with walking. I walk at least 12,000 steps per day according to my tracker and virtually never miss a day.  Besides the obvious physical health benefits, walking stimulates my thought process and the creation of new ideas.

What do you do when you are not mediating? 
I am a board member for a community, not-for-profit association and a volunteer math tutor for 4th graders in an underserved elementary school.  Professionally, I conduct workshops in negotiation theory and practice and have taught as an adjunct faculty member at several local universities and colleges.

Years in mediation  35
                     
Involvement in PCM:
Below are a few presentations I have conducted for PCM:
• Negotiation Theory and Practice (Helping Parties Reach an Acceptable Resolution)
• Mediation Ethics
• Negotiation Skills for Mediators

PCM Conference Workshop Preview: “Sorry” Doesn’t Have to Be The Hardest Word - A New Look at the Use of Apologies for Workplace Conflict Resolution

When faced with a workplace dispute, employers and employees often find themselves arguing over how to resolve the conflict exclusively through monetary compensation; this can quickly lead to an impasse. In this interactive session, Julie Procopiow Todd, Senior Administrative Judge, Equal Employment Opportunity Commission Philadelphia District Office will offer her perspective of how an apology - or some sort of acknowledgment about a conflict early in the dispute - can save money, improve morale, increase work productivity and improve relationships. She will proffer techniques for an apology, address legal concerns, and illustrate examples of both effective and ineffective apologies. Workshop take-aways include learning and applying techniques for making a proper apology while avoiding legal concerns, discerning effective and ineffective apologies, and assisting others in formulating apologies that can be effective both in the workplace and elsewhere.

Register today to join this and other exciting workshops.

PCM Conference Workshop Preview: Getting to Yes - And: Using Improvisation to Build Agreeable Atmosphere

Chris Fitz, Executive Director, Community Engagement for Advoz: Mediation & Restorative Practices (Lancaster, PA) & Director, River Crossing Playback Theatre will present this workshop. Changing the atmosphere of conflict is key to our sanity and our success. This workshop is an opportunity to experience and practice improvisation (also called improv theatre) that builds on a principle of “micro-agreements.” In addition to enabling joy, embodying a “yes - and” mindset can build a foundation for our parties and our trainees. Using warm-up exercises, partner activities and intuitive storytelling and role-playing, the workshop will provide space to reflect on ways that your own practice (and life) could benefit from cultivating ease, surprise and delight. Come prepared to move around, be playful and feel like a human being. Expect to leave with a few practical ideas and activities to enhance your practice.

To find out more or to register click here.

PCM Conference Workshop Preview: What’s Your Style? Communicating to Achieve Results

Join Cynthia D. Burrows, Diversity/EEO Manager, U.S. EPA, Region III at this PCM Conference workshop designed to help mediators communicate with the end in mind. The goal is always to help the participants in a mediation walk away with a sense of being understood and understanding more about the other party’s position. The objectives of this workshop are to identify 5 communication styles, to have participants determine the style they identify with the most, and to discuss ways they think each style can help or hinder a mediation and where mediators need to adjust to ensure they always use their style in a way that helps.

To learn more and to register click here.

Pre-Conference Training: BRINGING OUT THEIR (AND YOUR) BEST: STRATEGIES FOR MAKING DIFFICULT CONVERSATIONS LESS DIFFICULT

The PCM Conferece is pleased to offer this pre-conference training by Dr. Tammy Lenski of Friday, April 26, 2019. Since 1997 Dr. Tammy Lenski has worked with individuals and organizations worldwide as a mediator, coach, speaker, and educator. She specializes in resolving conflict and addressing friction in ongoing personal and business relationships. Tammy
co-founded the world’s first master’s degree program in mediation in 2002 and has taught conflict resolution in four university graduate programs. In 2012 the Association for Conflict Resolution recognized Tammy with the Mary Parker Follett Award for innovative and pioneering work in the field. In 2013 she was the first mediator appointed to ACR’s Academy of Advanced Practitioners, and in 2015 the New England Association for Conflict Resolution presented Tammy with the Pioneer Award. Her two books are The Conflict Pivot and Making Mediation Your Day Job.

“While many in my field focus on the peaceable ending of business and personal relationships,
I’m energized by addressing conflict and tension in ongoing professional and business
relationships.”

PCM Plenary Session: When the Center Cannot Hold: Conflict Transformation in an Age of Polarization

For its Plenary Session, the PCM Conference welcomes David Brubaker,  director of the MBA Program and serves as Associate Professor of Organizational Studies in the Center for Justice and Peacebuilding at Eastern Mennonite University. Mr. Brubaker has 30 years of experience in workplace mediation and training and in organizational and congregational consulting. He has consulted and trained with organizations throughout the U.S. and in a dozen international settings including Northern Ireland, Mozambique, Angola, Nepal, Myanmar, Egypt and Jordan. He is the author of numerous articles on conflict transformation and Promise and Peril: Understanding and Managing Change and Conflict in Congregations (published by The Alban Institute), and co-author of The Little Book of Healthy Organizations (Good Books). David will discuss the drivers of polarization, how polarization impacts relationships and systems, and the tools and processes that can transform a polarized conflict. Polarization refers to the process by which more and more people in a society come to hold opinions at the more extreme ends of the spectrum, while the number of people in the moderate center dwindles. Conflict transformation practitioners face both a challenge and an opportunity in the face of societal polarization, as our work is more demanding than ever…and yet has never been more essential.

Don't miss the opportunity hear more on this topic and many others. Register today for the conference.

PCM Workshop Preview: Avoiding the Titanic: Navigating Bankruptcy Mediation

“Bankruptcy” is a concept that frightens many mediators, who sense icebergs in the water, because they are unfamiliar with the law. Just as in other legal disciplines, many issues in bankruptcy cases are capable of settlement. Mediation offers parties a channel to reach agreement, bypassing the costs and time delays inherent in litigation. In this workshop,  Hon. Judith K. Fitzgerald, (Ret.) & Beverly Weiss Manne, Esq., co-chair of the Insolvency and Creditors’ Rights Department, both of Tucker Arensberg, P.C (Pittsburgh)will chart a course through several bankruptcy topics that skillful mediators can pilot even without detailed understanding of bankruptcy law and explain some of the processes used by bankruptcy courts that refer matters to mediation.

To register for the conference click here.

PCM Workshop Preview: Mindful Mediation: Understanding and Overcoming Barriers to Neutrality

Join us at the 2019 PCM Conference for a workshop presented by Deborah K. Gilman, Ph.D., licensed psychologist, and Lisa Standish, Esq., collaborative attorney. Working as mediators requires us to be neutral, impartial and objective to meet the needs of our clients. However, as humans, we have biases, we make judgments, we hold preferences. This workshop aims to increase your ability to mediate with CARE - Curiosity, Appreciation, Respect, Equanimity - by understanding and overcoming personal, client, and situational barriers to neutrality.

Click here to learn more about how you can join other dispute resolution professions for networking and education.

PCM Workshop Preview: Beyond the Presenting Problems: Converting a Mediation or Training Request into an Organizational Consulting Process

PCM is pleased to welcome David Brubaker to its annual conference for a workshop that will equip participants with a proven process that naturally emerges from a mediation or training request. Mediators bring unique skills to help resolve interpersonal conflicts, and many mediators have learned to also apply those skills to multi-party mediation processes requiring multiple sessions. An additional arena of practice for skilled mediators is organizational consulting. The stages of the mediation process and the skills that are required transfer directly to organizational consulting, particularly around issues of conflict and change.

For more on this and other workshops and to register click here.

PCM Conference Workshop Preview: Mentoring Mediators

Newly trained mediators recognize that their training was necessary but not sufficient to launch a successful mediation practice. New mediators want and need guidance as they begin to work with real disputants. Finding a more experienced mediator mentor can both accelerate the development of mediating competence and avoid the formation of less effective mediation habits. From the standpoint of the mediator mentor, there can be great satisfaction in paying forward the lessons learned from time and experience. Join Bruce I. Kogan, Esq., Professor Emeritus, Roger Williams University School of Law (Rhode Island) for this workshop providing tools and approaches for both mentor and mentee to make the mentoring partnership succeed within ethical considerations.

For more on this and other workshops and to register click here.

PCM Conference Workshop Preview: Updating your Mediation Practice to include Online Video Sessions: Skills and Techniques

How do you engage mediation clients who are not in the same room? Maybe not even in the same country? The technology to do a web-based mediation practice is so mature that teenagers regularly use it for the lion’s share of their social life, and seniors for keeping in touch with their grandchildren.

At the PCM Annual Conference April 27, 2019, Max Rivers will show you how to connect with clients anywhere in the world. His firm TheMarriageMediator.net does over 90% of its sessions over the internet.

PCM Conference Workshop Preview: Microaggressions

We are all conditioned to inflict microaggressions. Join us at the PCM Annual Conference on April 27, 2019 and you can attend this lively workshop where we will look at how to handle verbal, nonverbal and environmental microaggressions whether you are a bystander, a receiver or a sender.They can range from simple assumptions to bias and preferential treatment to outright injustice. The workshop will be led by Cheryl Cutrona, Esq., Executive Director, Good Shepherd Mediation Program & Sue Wasserkrug, Esq., Mediation Coordinator, Good Shepherd Mediation Program. For information about other workshops and to register for the conference click here.

PCM Conference Workshop Preview: Negotiation Theory and Practice: Helping parties reach an acceptable resolution

PCM is please to bring Stanley A. Braverman, Esq., President, Braverman Associates, LLC. to its 32nd annual conference to present "Negotiation Theory and Practice: Helping parties reach an acceptable resolution."

Essentially mediation is an assisted negotiation, where a neutral individual equally assists disputing parties in negotiating a solution to their dispute. The mediator’s increased knowledge of negotiation theory and practice can greatly help the disputing parties to reach a satisfactory conclusion to their conflict.

2019 Most Valuable Peacemaker (MVP) Award: Bonnie Millmore

The Pennsylvania Council of Mediators is honored to celebrate Bonnie Millmore's long and deep influence in Pennsylvania on the recognition of mediation’s benefits. PCM will do so by presenting her with the 2019 Most Valuable Peacemaker Award at its annual conference on April 26-27, 2019. 

Bonnie Millmore has been in the mediation and conflict resolution field for 35 years. She became Director of the community mediation program of The Center For Alternatives in Community Justice in 1984 and retired in 2018, She helped hundreds of families through CACJ's court-referred custody program. For 20 years she consulted as a mediator and trainer with the PA Office of Dispute Resolution program for families with educational disputes. Bonnie worked with many school districts across Pennsylvania to train school students and start peer mediation programs. She worked with the Pennsylvania State University's Justice and